There was a long season when I woke up most mornings with a quiet dread before the day even began. Nothing catastrophic had happened…no tragedy, no loss, no diagnosis. Just work. A job that had once felt purposeful had become a source of discouragement and exhaustion.

It wasn’t the kind of “hard” that makes headlines. That almost made it worse, because I couldn’t justify how heavy it felt. I’d tell myself to shake it off, be grateful, and toughen up, but the heaviness stayed.

It wasn’t just the work that was hard; it was what the work was revealing in me: my pride, my longing for affirmation, my belief that being an effective leader meant pushing through instead of admitting weakness. I was working for approval from all the wrong places – namely, from others. And when that approval didn’t come, I sank deeper into discouragement and even brought it home to my family each day.

I prayed often for change, for clarity, and/or for something to shift. But God didn’t deliver the answers to me on my doorstep. He didn’t change my circumstances and make things easier or rescue me from the discomfort I really wanted to escape.

Amidst my daily prayer and yielding (because I knew it was the only response that could give me any hope!), I sensed that God wasn’t ignoring or punishing me;  He was inviting me to trust Him differently. He was teaching me that this part of my journey wasn’t to be about escaping the hard but enduring it. Perhaps He wanted to grow something in me that couldn’t be developed any other way.

Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
— James 1:4

As weeks turned into months (ha! yes, friends, I endured!), small moments started to stand out. A conversation that sparked something in me. A scripture that surfaced in my morning devotion. A peace that slipped in just long enough to get me through the next meeting. Those moments became reminders that God was with me. I began to remember seasons when He had carried me, doors He had opened, and prayers He had answered in ways I hadn’t expected. This remembering didn’t change my job, but it changed my posture. I could feel that God was doing a work in me, and so I tried to remain steadfast and patient (even harder for me!)

God was teaching me how to stay – not out of resignation, but out of obedience. To stay when I couldn’t control things. To stay when my pride wanted to quit. To stay when faith meant simply doing the next right thing even when I didn’t feel inspired or seen.

The circumstances at work didn’t change much over time. But I changed a lot.

Slowly, I stopped striving to prove myself and started praying, “God, do whatever You need to do with me here.” “God help me to see them and love them the way You see and love them.” My dependence on all things external and out of my control was replaced with quiet confidence in Him. The season that was so hard started to feel incredibly free. Looking back, I see that God’s mercy didn’t come as escape; it came as endurance. He didn’t rush me out of that season; He grew me through it. It was exactly what I needed. To grow closer to God, refine how I engage at work, and encourage others around me.

Looking Back

I’ve been learning that faith is stepping into tomorrow not knowing what it will bring, and remembering God’s faithfulness in my life is what will carry me through the unknown and the hard. I recently read that faith is not blind hope, but anchored trust. Such truth! It captures the power of trusting the Lord and remembering His goodness in every season we walk through.

When new uncertainty comes (and it’s been coming at me a lot lately!), I’m trying to make it a practice to remember—to look back on the chapters of my life that were hard and uncertain, just like my hard chapters at work, and see how His faithfulness met me there. It’s always there. Scripture promises that He will never leave or forsake us (Deuteronomy 31:6). It reminds us that He can do immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20). It assures us that His love for us never fails (Romans 8:38–39).

And as a friend and pastor recently said in a message that stuck with me, “You might need to go all the way back to 33 A.D. to remember…that God gave His only Son to die on the cross for our sins.” If I ever need proof of His faithfulness, I can always start there.

Remembering that hard work season reminds me that faith isn’t something I just muster up when life gets uncertain; it’s something God has been forming in me all along. Every hard thing has become a kind of marker, a reminder that His faithfulness isn’t circumstantial; it’s consistent.

And remembering doesn’t mean living in the past; it means carrying forward the evidence of God’s faithfulness into whatever comes next. It’s looking ahead with hope because you’ve looked back with gratitude.

Faith remembers that even when we can’t see what’s next, we already know Who’s been with us all along.

Please pray with me…

Lord, thank You for Your goodness in my life, even when my circumstances are not ideal. Thank You for how You refine me in them, and forgive me when I am impatient and sit in discouragement. Please help me to remember daily Your goodness and how You are our Rescuer. I want to trust You and walk with full faith in Your Goodness. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.