I’ve been so excited to write about the word, flourish. It’s one of my favorite words and is often top-of-mind for me. I love personal growth, whether it’s my own or others’, and I genuinely cheer for anyone who is making the most of their life and receiving all of the goodness that comes with it. Often there is a glow, so to speak, that radiates from people who are flourishing; their success shines.

Interestingly, research has shown that young people today equate success with being rich and famous. It’s heartbreaking, knowing these things are not only fleeting, but also a shallow substitute for genuine joy. Sure, they can make for a moment spectacular, but no amount of fame or material possessions can fulfill the true longing of our hearts and souls. They will only leaving you wanting for more until you realize they never truly satisfy.

Actually, the “secret” to flourishing is revealed in scripture. In John 10:10, Jesus says, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full(emphasis mine).” He goes on to refer to Himself as the Good Shepherd and explains that He knows His sheep, and His sheep know Him. Most importantly, He makes sure that He protects His flock and is willing to lay down His life for them.

The secret to flourishing begins with knowing Jesus.

I was recently on a family trip that created memories I will forever cherish. My mother-in-law, JoEllen joined my husband, sister-in-law, and me at a scenic and magnificent resort in Mexico’s Mayan Riviera. It’s long been a proclaimed “happy place” for us, and as such, has created a strong desire to share it with those we love. JoEllen was, without a doubt, at the top of the list, knowing so many things would be new to her, and she would delight in every detail. Indeed, she did. But the reason why causes me to cheer for her even more than I always do (she is so easy to celebrate!).

Each morning, we shared coffee and deep conversation. She’s never been afraid to be vulnerable, honest, and transparent, and it only makes everyone adore her more. Early in the trip, she divulged that she had chosen a word of the year, a theme she could hold herself accountable to living. Her word was, “YES!” And her reasoning was not only sound, but inspirational.

JoEllen is 80-years-old and slightly limited in her mobility. She’s lived a full life and is beloved by everyone who knows her. She is also one of the wisest and most perceptive people I’ve ever met. Her motivation to say YES is simply rooted in God. She told me, “If He’s giving me breath in my lungs, I want to use it.” She went on to explain that it can be easy in her life stage to stay at home, isolate, remain comfortable and cozy, and just watch television. But she recognizes that choice would prohibit her from engaging with others, continuing to learn, and experiencing new things. She admitted she needed the intentionality of her word, YES, but what she is receiving from it is worth it! JoEllen realized that God’s desire isn’t just for us to survive; He wants us to thrive! And in our time together on that trip, we joyfully celebrated so many firsts for her while she soaked in God’s goodness in all forms, from new sights and flavors, to new experiences, deeper connections, and a validation to continue seeking all that God still has for her.

Following my wise mother-in-law’s lead, what does it take to flourish? There are four things that are apparent to me:

A desire to love (God and others). 

This is life’s priority, according the Jesus (Matthew 22:37-39). To love God, you have to know Him. That means picking up your Bible regularly and asking Him to reveal Himself to you as you read. He will. And it doesn’t stop at head knowledge of who He is, it progresses to a relationship with Him. How? Just like any other relationship, you seek time alone together for honest conversation (Matthew 6:6), you patiently listen to responses (James 1:5), and you trust (Proverbs 3:5-6). Amazingly, when you love God, He fills you to overflowing, making it easier and more natural to extend grace and love others. It’s no coincidence, either. Believers are meant to offer glimpses of Him and tangible evidence of the Holy Spirit’s presence in our lives (Ephesians 2:10). God uses us to show His great love! (Worth noting, JoEllen has often encouraged and shared wisdom with younger women, and because of that, she’s often dubbed “Mama Jo!”)

A willingness to seek, develop, and live your purpose (God’s unique plan for your life).

We are each made differently, with a combination of gifts, talents, personality traits, and strengths. This is GOOD and exactly what God intended. We were not all created just like JoEllen, but we are all meant to use what we have! And make no mistake, it will coincide with our purpose and His plans. He has equipped each of us perfectly for what He has called us to do (1 Peter 4:10, Romans 12:4-8). When we are serving Him and others, we will be energized!

An authentic sharing of life in community and friendship. 

It is not good for man to be alone (Genesis 2:18). This was established from the very beginning of creation. God absolutely works through the people in your life, and when you are isolated, hiding secrets, or not living transparently, it limits the support that is available to you. Christian friends are able to lead you back to God and hold you accountable in the best ways. When we are unable to see truth clearly, a good friend can lovingly show you the way back. Not only that, but we are made in image of God, One who is constantly communing with Jesus and the Holy Spirit. We need others to thrive; we cannot do it on our own (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, Galatians 6:2, Hebrews 10:24-25). You may need the help, or God can use you as the helper – both lead to great rewards!

A surrender to Him.

Although the word surrender may lead you to think of giving up, consider it more of a giving in. It’s a releasing of our stubbornness and/or arrogance that we know best or can control things and choosing instead to follow the Sovereign God, who is always working for our good (Romans 8:28, John 5:17). God is not bound by time, knowledge, or ability. A surrender to Him is simply acknowledging His almighty power (1 Chronicles 29:11-2) and choosing to trust His wisdom over our (perceived) own. It’s saying YES to Him, even when we may not know the exact outcome. It’s just what JoEllen is doing. And if she can do it, can’t we try, too?

Let’s draw closer to Him, seek His will, surround ourselves with support, and get ready to say YES! Our ability to flourish will be unhindered, and our best days will surely be ahead!

Lord, thank You for the precious example You give us in JoEllen. What a gift to have others in our lives to share Your wisdom. We praise You for giving her the word, “YES!” and we ask that You would not only bless her for using it, but You would give us the courage and blessing as well. Take our yeses, Lord and use them for our flourishing and Your glory! In Jesus’ name, Amen.